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January 10th, 2010 at 9:44 pm

In this tough economic time where we are confronted with multiple and challenging employment decisions, it is rare that we find both wisdom and levity bound together so poignantly.


HOW TO RECRUIT THE RIGHT PERSON FOR THE JOB?

Put about 100 bricks in some Particular order in a closed Room with an Open window.

Then send 2 or 3 candidates in the room and close the door.

Leave them alone and come back after 6 hours and then analyze the situation.

If they are counting the Bricks, put them in the Accounting Department.

If they are recounting them, put them in Auditing.

If they have messed up the whole place with the bricks, put them in Engineering.

If they are arranging the bricks in some strange order, put them in Planning.

 

If they are throwing the bricks at each other, put them in Operations.

If they are sleeping, put them in Security.

If they have broken the bricks into pieces, put them in Information Technology.

If they are sitting idle, put them in Human Resources.

If they say they have tried different combinations, yet not a brick has been moved, put them in Sales.

If they have already left for the day, put them in Marketing.

If they are staring out of the window, put them on Strategic Planning.

And then last but not least.  If they are talking to each other and not a single brick has been moved,

Congratulate them and put them in Top Management.

 

Good Monday morning to you,

 

Phil Lower
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July 29th, 2009 at 7:12 am

 

5 Classic Dumb Executive Moves

By Steve Tobak

July 24th, 2009 @ 2:25 pm

 

 

Folks really seemed to get a lot out of 5 Classic Boardroom Mistakes, so I thought I’d up the ante with these idiotic executive moves. And you know what’s really special about these particular mistakes? I made them. 

That’s right; you too can make idiotic mistakes and still become a successful executive. So why air my own dirty laundry? A few reasons:

  1. They’re funny.
  2. It’s cathartic for me and I think heartening for aspiring executives to know that successful ones do dumb things too.
  3. Why not? Besides, I did most of them early in my management career … but not all of them!

5 Classic Dumb Executive Moves:

  • After National Semiconductor acquired Cyrix, National’s CEO - Brian Halla - introduced me as the new VP of corporate marketing (same job I had at Cyrix) at a companywide quarterly meeting. It would have been a nice gesture … had I actually been there. Not realizing what a big deal it was, I skipped the meeting to get some work done. Bad idea.

 

  • Way back when, before sexual harassment litigation was a big thing, after-hours at a tradeshow in Atlanta, I and a few other executives of a public company took a couple of our female employees - at their request, I may add - to a gentlemen’s club. No harm was done and we all had a good time, but what the hell we were thinking?

 

  • As CEO of a startup during the tech bubble, while pitching a prominent Silicon Valley venture capitalist to raise some funds, I gripped a mechanical sample of a silicon device too tightly and it shattered in my hands. Reliability was supposed to be a key selling point of the technology. We didn’t get the money.

 

  • Back in the day, before we used computers to give presentations, we used transparencies on overhead projectors. I was sitting in a relatively high-level customer meeting, waiting for the sales manager to finish his introductions, when I realized that I - the featured speaker - had forgotten to bring my transparencies. Talk about embarrassing. 

 

  • Ten years ago, when you edited a file somebody sent you as a Lotus email attachment, forget to save it to a local disk and shut down your PC, you lost the changes. Well, I had worked on an important pitch for days, thinking I was saving it when I wasn’t. When I rebooted my computer, I lost the entire pitch and had to stay up all night recreating it. Years later there was an episode of Friends where that happened to Ross.  

Okay, I came clean; now it’s your turn. What incredibly stupid things have you done at work? You even get to do it anonymously!
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November 4th, 2008 at 12:34 pm

I am currently reading the autobiography of Benjamin Franklin. It is very inspiring to read about a man with very little education who accomplished so many things.

 

Today is election day and because this election is so important, I felt inspired to reflect upon Benjamin Franklin and the principles that that made this cou ntry what it is today before I went to the poles.

 

Do not forget to get out and vote.

 

May the best man win!

 

Have a great election day and God bless America.
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September 13th, 2008 at 7:33 am

 

Women Don’t Ask: Linda Babcock and Sara Laschever, 2007, Bantam Books.

 

Ask for it: Linda Babcok and Sara Laschever, 2008, Bantam Books.

 

Overcoming the Superwoman Syndrome:  Edited by Linda Ellis Eastman, 2007, Professional Woman Publishing.

 

Women’s Survival Guide for Overcoming Obstacles, Transition & Change, Edited by Linda Ellis Eastman, 2007, Professional Woman Publishing.

 

Good in a Room, Stephanie Palmer, 2008, Doubleday.

 

Basic Black, Cathie Black, 2007, Crown Publishing Group.

 

The Three Signs of a Miserable Job, Patrick Lencioni, 2007, Jossey-Bass.

 

The Gift of Change, Marianne Williamson, 2004, HarperCollins.

 

The Art of Racing in the Rain, Garth Stein, 2008, Bright White Light, LLC. (As described from a dog’s point of view.)
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